Undercover
by MKRG
Summary: Daniel and Vala go undercover to identify a rogue Goauld hiding among the academia at the University of Chicago. They believe the alien is responsible for a series of unexplained deaths. A humorous adventure. DV Oneshot


**Title**: Undercover

**Summary**: Daniel and Vala go undercover to identify a rogue Goauld hiding among the academia at the University of Chicago. They believe the alien is responsible for a series of unexplained deaths. DV

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An unusual sound roared over the fields of a remote farming town just hours from Chicago. A few locals bothered to look through their kitchen windows, searching for the source of the noise. Those who looked saw nothing. But the sound was there.

A trained ear would have identified it as the engine of a Goa'uld cargo ship. No cloak could disguise its hum in the atmosphere of a planet.

Within seconds, the noise was gone. Those who wondered about it dismissed it as the sound of a jet too far up in the clouds to be seen. The locals went back to their nightly routines, unaware of the dangerous visitor.

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"Dr. Jackson," General Landry greeted his subordinate. Daniel nodded a greeting in turn. "Take a seat."

He complied. "Is there something you need, General?" Daniel normally didn't get called into private conference with the head of the base without good reason. He suspected another SG team had brought back something significant for him to translate.

"You could say that. General O'Neill says this would be the perfect job for you," Landry replied as he scanned a report labeled _Top Secret_. "Here, take a look."

Daniel furrowed his brow as he looked over the papers. "It says here that there have been a series of unexplained and seemingly unrelated murders in and around Chicago." He glanced up at the General, clearly puzzled. "What does this have to do with me? Isn't this a job for a police detective to solve?"

"Not when homeworld security is at stake. We believe the deaths are the work of a rogue Goa'uld who has managed to infiltrate Earth."

"Really? Which one?"

"We don't know. That's what we need you to find out. Your knowledge of the Goa'uld is invaluable. You may be able to piece the clues together to figure out who this is and what it wants."

"Right. What do we know so far?"

"Very little. The intel we have is there in the report. We do know that the murders have slowly crept closer and closer to your old stomping grounds in Chicago."

"The University?"

"Yes. We have reason to believe the Goa'uld may have disguised himself within it, not unlike with your friend, Ms. Gardner." Daniel tried not to flinch at the sound of her name. Too many bad memories there. The General took back the report and handed him another. "These are your orders. You are to make contact with your old department at the University of Chicago, under the pretense that you have to perform vital research of a vague nature."

"Which is hardly far from the truth," Daniel added.

"While there, figure out what's going on. Find out who's new in town and who's acting suspicious. You need to find this Goa'uld."

Daniel nodded, though aprehensively. In all the years since Sarah's abduction, he had tried to put the very word 'Chicago' to the back of his mind. He was silently thankful that he had never needed to go back and face his old colleagues. Until now.

The General went on, "But be wary, Dr. Jackson. We don't want to tip our hand. You can't let the Goa'uld know you're on to him."

"Meaning don't engage him. Or her." He nodded. "No argument here. But sir, how will I know it's a Goa'uld? I don't have the ability to sense its presence."

An almost untracable smile crept across the General's face. "Ah. That's where she comes in…" He stood up and opened the side door. "You can come in now."

A pig-tailed Vala Mal Doran bounced in. "Hello, Darling," she said casually. She took a seat next to him.

"You want _her_ to come with me? To Chicago?" he said as calmly as possible. Daniel tried not to betray his discomfort.

"It makes sense, Dr. Jackson. Everyone else with the ability is otherwise occupied, except for Lt. Meeks of SG-14. Though, I don't think he'd pass very well as your girlfriend."

If Daniel had been drinking coffee, he would have choked on it. "My what?" His jaw dropped.

Vala grinned and patted his thigh. "Surprise!" She used her index finger to push his bottom jaw back up.

"You and Vala are to pose as a couple while in Chicago. You've been officially together for a few months now. She's tagging along to be your research assistant."

"Why can't she _just_ be my research assistant?" Daniel stammered.

"Because, Daniel. We'll be together 24 hours a day. No research assistant could stand that unless she was sleeping with the boss," Vala explained. She waggled her eyebrows in his direction. He glared back.

The General coughed. "It will also explain why you'll both attend the fundraiser ball in 3 days."

"A ball? You mean an actual black-tie affair?"

"They say I'll need a knock-out dress," Vala said excitedly.

"It's the best opportunity to detect the Goa'uld. If our intel is correct, then it will be there. While you and Vala make the rounds and mingle, she'll be able to sense its presence. Once that happens, all you have to do is make the call and we'll send in a team."

"That simple, huh?" Daniel said, incredulously.

"I wouldn't say simple, Dr. Jackson. But that's the plan."

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They took a commercial flight from Colorado to Illinois. The Air Force and NID suspected that the rogue Goa'uld had made connections with the Trust. Knowing that, Daniel and Vala's every move would be watched.

The flight was delayed due to bad weather. They landed at O'Hare three hours late and snarky. As they walked through the retractable hallway connecting the airplane to the gate, Daniel held on tightly to Vala's arm. "Now you listen to me," he whispered. "If you're going to be my girlfriend, you're going to follow some rules. No overt sexual gestures or comments. Don't drape yourself all over me like some lovesick puppy. Don't…"

"Don't do this. Don't do that," she interrupted, clearly annoyed. She stopped him and looked dead in his eyes. "Daniel, I get it. You want someone more… _conservative_." She held up air quotes with her fingers. "I can do conservative." He didn't look convinced. She held a finger under his chin. "I can be whatever you want," Vala said in a low tone. Her finger slid sideways as she walked off.

He watched after her, momentarily stunned. She sashayed those hips in just that way… "And don't walk like that!" She turned around and glared at him, but never stopped moving. How she managed all that with two large luggage carriers was unfathomable to him. He caught up to her. "It's too…"

"Too what?" she challenged.

He could only groan in response. He didn't want to say "sexy."

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Outside, Daniel waited for a taxi. It seemed that everyone else was having better luck than him tonight. As he struggled to get a driver's attention, Vala's eyes were on the people around her. A security guard walking the perimeter. A traffic cop writing a ticket for a motorist. People milling about waiting for their rides. The man leaning against the concrete column reading a newspaper, but occasionally glancing at her. _Gotcha._ Vala leaned in to whisper her discovery to Daniel. He looked up in surprise but quickly covered his response. A taxicab drove up and they got in.

In the hotel, Vala scanned the lobby while Daniel checked them in. She pretended to be enamored with the elaborate décor of the old hotel, which she secretly was, while checking out the people hanging around. Another pair of gentlemen with newspapers seemed to be spying on her from the couches. She wrapped an arm around Daniel's waist and whispered in his ear, putting on a seductive smile as she let him know. He grated his teeth, but put on a false smile back.

They were in the elevator within seconds. A young, pimple-faced bellhop had joined them, clearly enamored with Vala. She pretended not to notice and leaned into Daniel. She bunched up his shirt in her fists. Her face was uncomfortably close to his. _Didn't I tell her _not_ to do things like this?_ She whispered in his ear, "If they've got men on the ground watching, I can guarentee you that this elevator is bugged. We should look for more listening devices in the room." She kissed his cheek and rubbed her nose with his, smiling. The bellhop looked away. Daniel mentally banged his head on the wall. _She's enjoying this way too much._

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Daniel slipped his keycard into the slot and unlocked the door. They walked in silently, wary of what others might be able to hear. After they tipped the bellhop for bringing in their bags, Vala made some fleeting comment about the décor as she checked underneath a desk lamp.

He took the hint and headed for the phone. "Yeah, it's nicer than a lot of other places I've… we've, been before." He unscrewed the mouthpiece and found a bug inside. He flashed it at her before screwing the mouthpiece back on.

"It's certainly… comfortable." She lined her hands underneath the bed frame, finding nothing. Daniel did the same in the drawers, discovering another bug hidden in one.

"I'm going to check out the bathroom." She reappeared within a minute and shook her head _no_. At least that was clear.

Daniel peeked through the curtains. "It's certainly a nice view of the city. At least there's no buildings to block our view of the skyline." _There aren't any windows that could be used to spy on us._ He noted that there were also no video cameras hidden among the curtains. He turned around to see a mischievious grin on his companion's face.

'What?' he mouthed.

"It's too bad we can't take full advantage of this luxurious bed, Daniel."

"Oh… what do you mean?"

"I wouldn't want to ruin the sheets. You _know_ how we get. I would feel _terrible_ for whoever has to clean our bed."

He frowned. He was thankful that Vala was coming up with an excuse not to have sex, but he wasn't happy with the implications of the actual excuse. He didn't want anyone hearing this. If Jack found out, he would never let him live this down. He coughed, not knowing what to say.

Vala rolled her eyes. "Of course..." She slowly ran a finger along the silken comforter as she walked the perimeter of the king-size bed. "There's always the shower." His jaw dropped. "You know it's always _clean_," she said significantly. _We can have frank conversation in the bathroom without fear of anyone hearing._

_Great_, he thought. _Just great._ "Uhm…" Daniel was saved by the tone of his cell phone. "Daniel Jackson. Oh, hello Dr. Reed. Yes, yes, we're settling in now. Breakfast? Tomorrow? Of course, what time? Great, we'll be there. Goodbye." He turned to Vala. "Looks like the shower will have to wait, _Darling_. We're meeting with Dr. Reed early for breakfast. Wouldn't want to go without a good night's rest now would we?"

Vala frowned. Daniel smirked. "I guess you're right," she said with as little annoyance as she could manage. _Touche, Dr. Jackson. But I'm not done with you yet._ She stripped down to her undies in a matter of seconds. Daniel didn't even have time to turn around before black lace was exposed. He struggled not to react, in any way. "You like it? It's new. I got this especially for you." She hopped onto the bed and posed seductively. "Let's cuddle."

Daniel turned beet red. "Uhh, in a… in a minute. Just give me a minute to, uh, wash up." He ran into the bathroom and locked the door. Vala covered her mouth with her hand, struggling not to laugh out loud.

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"Nope, not him." Vala waved at Dr. Reed as he rode away in a taxicab.

"Thank goodness for that," Daniel responded. "One down, about a thousand other potential Goa'uld to go."

She grabbed his hand. "Take me shopping."

"What? Now? We have to get to work."

He pulled his hand away instinctively. "Daniel," she whined, glaring at him in warning. She used both hands to grab his this time. "You told me you would show me the city, remember?"

He sighed. He knew she was reminding him to act like her boyfriend. "Yes, yes, I remember. But why don't we save that for a little later, hmm?"

Daniel prepared himself for more whiny Vala, but was surprised to get none. "You're right, Darling. What was I thinking? Shall we?" _Conservative, think conservative. _She smiled and pulled him along down the street toward the University.

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The pair met up with more of Daniel's old colleagues for lunch, and thankfully, none of them were Goa'uld either. The work they pretended to do was boring, and Vala was itching to find something to do. Daniel finally had enough of her whining and made her "take a break."

She was quite irritated when she exited the small, stuffy room they had been given to work in. It was worse than his office in the SGC. Vala found herself staring at a painting on a wall not far from their room. She chose to stand there for longer than a minute out of pure boredom.

"I find it hauntingly reminsiscent of the Nativity scene, don't you think?" a male voice came up from behind her.

"Huh?" Vala had no idea what he was talking about. The man who spoke stepped up next to her. He was tall, dark, and handsome. He looked to be a little older than Daniel.

He smiled warmly. "Of course, everyone has their opinions. I'm sure you see something quite different. Everyone does," he said, gesturing to the painting.

"Oh, right. You know… uh… I'm not sure I could really make a good guess without knowing where this piece… originates." Vala hoped that would pass for an intelligent sounding non-answer.

"Ahh, too true. One cannot truly analyze a piece of the past without knowing its context." He held out a hand. "Dr. Richard Leeman."

"Vala Mal Doran." She held out a hand to shake his, but instead, he took it and held it to his mouth for a kiss. She couldn't help but smile at first. But there was something off about the way he continued to hold onto her hand. Her time out there in the galaxy had taught her a few things about men.

"I haven't seen you here before. Are you new to the University?"

"Oh, no. I'm just here to help with some research…"

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Daniel checked his watch. He wondered where Vala could have gotten too. He hoped she hadn't gotten lost, or worse, into some trouble. He got up to search for her and saw her chatting it up with some man. _Typical_. He pushed his hands into his pockets and headed for them from down the hall.

It wasn't long before he noticed a difference in Vala's behavior. No flirtatious smiles or gestures. She wasn't standing abhorrently close, so close you could smell the sweet perfume of her hair. Her hands were carefully clasped behind her back, unable to reach out and stroke anyone's cheek affectionately. And if he could see correctly, she almost looked… uncomfortable.

The man took a small step forward. Daniel frowned. "Vala?"

She turned to him instantly, a secret look of relief on her face that only Daniel could detect. "Darling, there you are." She smiled widely and held out a hand for him.

The instant he saw exactly who she was talking to, he felt his temperature rise. _God, not him_. The need to protect what was his overcame him. He didn't take Vala's hand, but instead wrapped his arm around her waist tightly. She returned the gesture. "I see you've met Dr. Leeman."

"Please, Daniel, it's Richard. You and I have known each other far too long to be bothered with such formalities."

He plastered a fake smile on his face. "Of course, Richard." He turned to Vala and said, "Honey, if you don't mind, I'd like your help with something back in the office." She nodded compliantly.

"Ahh, this is _your_ assistant. You're lucky to have one as beautiful and intelligent as she is." The jealous, biting tone was not lost on either Daniel or Vala.

"Vala isn't _just_ my assistant," Daniel replied without hesitation, "she's also my girlfriend." A hint of a frown crossed Richard's face.

"Then there must be more than luck at work here. I'll leave you to it, then. Vala, it was a pleasure. We should chat more sometime. I'd love to hear what you think of some of the pieces in the other building." She responded with a thin smile. Richard turned to Daniel and held out his hand. "Daniel."

Never letting go of Vala's waist, he offered his free hand. "Richard." Casually, he began to lead the both of them away.

"Be seeing you," Richard called out after them.

When they got back to the room, Vala let out a breath of relief. "Gawd! I wanted to punch that man!"

"What did he do? Did he come on to you? Did he touch you?"

Vala stared at him a moment. "Not exactly. He didn't say or do anything overtly threatening. There was just something about his condescending tone. Come to think of it - kind of like yours."

"What? Mine!"

"Yes, that 'I'm above you' type of attitude."

"Excuse me? I don't have a superiority complex. Far from it! After all we've been through, you actually think…"

She put a hand to his lips to stop him. "Darling, relax, I was kidding."

He groaned and slapped her hand away, eliciting a giggle from her. "You're trying to push my buttons again. Vala, now is the worst time."

"Sorry, I just couldn't resist. It was just so cute to see you flustered that another man was talking to me." She smiled sweetly.

He scrunched his face at her in return. "Well if you knew his history you wouldn't think it's so cute. You'd be thanking me."

"Don't get me wrong, Darling. I am grateful, especially since I'm supposed to play some poor, defenseless woman. If it were any other day, he would be on the floor bleeding in a heartbeat." She crossed her arms and shook her sleek ponytail with finality.

Daniel couldn't help but smile at that comment. "Don't I know it." After a pause, he added, "You did well. I don't think anyone would guess your… ahem… true nature."

She fluffed her hair. "Well, I do try. I always thought I had a bit of an acting streak in me." Daniel scoffed loudly. "Hey!"

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The days continued on at a slow pace. The boring work didn't seem to have an end. Neither of them had found a solid lead to the mysterious Goa'uld. Not even when someone from the University's cleaning crew had turned up dead in a janitor's closet.

Daniel and Vala suspected that their mystery alien had something to do with it. But the coroner ruled the death to be the result of a heart attack. Vala quietly reminded Daniel that the Goa'uld could kill a victim in any number of painful ways.

It wasn't long before the ball had arrived. Now it was half an hour before the event, and Vala still hadn't come out of the bathroom. Daniel sat there on the bed, completely dressed up in his tux and ready to go. "Vala!" he called out. "Hurry up, we need to go!" The irritation is his voice was undeniable.

"Oh don't get your panties in a bunch! I'm almost done!" she yelled back just as irritable.

"Don't get my… ugh!" He would kill whatever air force officer taught her that one. He already had a prime suspect – Cameron. He shot up and headed for the bathroom door. He was about to raise his fist to bang it down when the door opened. Daniel froze.

He noticed her eyes first, shimmering in the light. Her cheeks were rosy; her lips red. Those full lips curved into a curious smile. His eyes couldn't help but roll down over the rest of her curvacious body. Her cleavage was exposed, eliciting a response that he dared not have. The shimmering red dress hugged her curves and he fought for his hands to not grab her waist. His eyes traveled back up to her face, and he noticed her hair in soft curls that were slightly pulled back. Vala was radiant.

"Uh, wow. You look…" One of her eyebrows went up in Teal'c fashion. "Absolutely beautiful."

A megawatt smile lit up her face. Daniel couldn't help but smile in return. She stepped into the hallway to check herself out in the full length mirror. As she turned, he noticed the way the dress hugged _all_ of her curves in the back as well. Again, he fought his body for control. He won the fight by grabbing her purse and shooing her out the hotel room with him.

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The room was already crowded by the time they got there. Many of Daniel's old colleagues, nearly all of which had openly ridiculed him in the past, came up to greet the pair. It seemed that Daniel wasn't the only one admiring Vala that night. He almost felt on top of the world being able to say that she belonged to him. If only it weren't such a lie. She belonged to no man, and she made sure of it.

He held on to her, any part of her, as long as he could. Her waist. Her hand. Even her elbow. Daniel was fearful she would slip away unnoticed with some other man. _You're being irrational. We both know we aren't here for fun, and there's work to do. She won't leave. She _can't _leave._

Vala didn't seem to mind Daniel's protectiveness. She was, after all, supposed to be more compliant. More conservative. If only he knew just how hard that was, what with all the attention she was getting. From him. _If it were any other day… __I'd jump his bones._

Dinner had already concluded and the dancing had begun. The pair mingled as they were ordered to by General Landry. Daniel made small talk with people he hardly cared for while Vala tuned her "spidey-sense" as she had come to call it. As yet, they hadn't come across a single Goa'uld. Several men, now loose by the power of alcohol, seemed eager to approach Vala. But Daniel was never too far away to ward them off. It only took a look on his part. He didn't need to be a battle-hardened soldier to give that look. Just a jealous boyfriend.

They finally took a break from the mingling and leaned against the wall. She dropped her head on his shoulder and he wrapped an arm around her waist. Yawning, she whispered, "Daniel, I'm starting to think we'll never find it. Are they sure they got their intel right?"

"I'm starting to wonder myself."

A male voice interuppted their private conversation. "I see that the lady is getting a bit tired. But would she care for one dance before she retires for the night?" The smooth velvet tone of Richard Leeman was undeniable. Daniel seethed. This was the last assistant he would ever harass. He was about to open his mouth to say 'No' on Vala's behalf when he felt her break his embrace.

"Why not?" she replied. And Richard led her away so easily. Daniel stood there, dumbfounded. Had she not just been hanging all over him all night? Wasn't that the guy she wanted to beat up just a few days ago? How could she? The pang of betrayal seeped into him.

He watched them travel all the way to the dancefloor until another colleague interupted him. "Daniel Jackson? Hey hey, it really is you!" The man grabbed his hand and shook it heartily. Years ago this man hated him for all he was worth. Now he owed his life to Daniel, as did much of the world.

"Steven. Hello."

"How have you been? I haven't seen you since, well," his voice went down to a whisper, "you know." They both knew that he was referring to the incident with Sarah. Steven had been forced to sign a nondisclosure agreement by the Air Force and had faithfully kept his mouth shut all these years.

"I know. I'm here on business." Daniel scanned the dancefloor desperately. He had lost sight of Vala.

"Oh right. Business. Well, I won't ask. I'm sure it's very important, though." He noticed the distracted look on Daniel's face. Steven turned to where he must have been looking, but saw nothing interesting until he caught a flash of red. "Hey isn't that the date you brought along over there? She's beautiful, Daniel. Where'd you meet her?"

Daniel turned briefly to him and said, "It's a long story, Steven. One that I don't have enough time to tell." He turned back to see Richard hugging Vala close. She grimaced just long enough for him to catch it. Richard was hurting her. "Sorry, Steven. It was nice seeing you but I gotta go." Daniel made it to the edge of the dancefloor when Richard caught sight of him.

He twirled Vala around, bringing her deeper into the foray of dancing couples. Anger boiled up inside Daniel. _He looked straight at me with that smirk. I'm gonna kill him._

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A few minutes earlier, Vala had a funny feeling about Richard. When he approached her, she instantly felt her blood boil and goosebumps litter her flesh. It couldn't be. Why didn't she have this feeling before, the first time they had met? Vala had to know, and so she felt compelled to double-check. It had been years since she felt the presence of a Goa'uld this close. Somehow, she hoped that she was wrong about this man.

It wasn't long before she realized her instinct had been correct. She played along as if she knew nothing, but Vala was sure that Richard had the same feeling about her. She had to take advantage of this while she could. She needed to get information. He wouldn't let her go anyway.

"So, tell me about yourself, Richard. What do you do at the University?"

"Come now, let's not talk about my work." He squeezed her close. "Let's talk about you."

"Me? Oh, there's nothing much to say about me."

"I beg to disagree. There is something about you, Vala. I can feel it. You're special." A sneer formed on his face.

_He knows. He can feel it. He knows I used to be a host! _"Special? Oh no, I'm just plain Vala." Richard squeezed her hand tightly, causing her to grimace. "Stop. You're hurting me."

"What's a little pain to a former host?" He saw Daniel approaching and quickly twirled her around and deeper into the crowd.

He began to squeeze her to him so hard that it was becoming difficult to breathe. Yet no one around her seemed to notice. If she couldn't get out of this soon she'd have to scream for help. "Don't bother to scream. I'll snap your neck so quick you won't even get the chance to open your mouth."

Vala tried to swallow the fear that was knotting in her gut. "Who are you?"

"Who else? Your God." Vala began to struggle. "There is no need to fight. I will have the knowledge left in your mind by Osiris. Allow me to extract it, and I will let you live," he lied.

"Osiris? What?" Confusion was evident on Vala's face.

"Richard!" Daniel stepped forward. "Let her go."

"Stay out of this, Jackson. She's mine now."

"Daniel, he's a…" Richard slapped her across the face. Vala stumbled into another pair of dancers. They tried to right her, but she was too disoriented. Others seemed to notice and stopped to stare.

Daniel rushed at Richard, not realizing what Vala had tried to communicate. All he knew was that this man had tried to hurt her. His Vala. Richard punched Daniel before he could get near him. He was down in milliseconds.

He could feel the air rush out of him from the impact. A circle of confused patrons formed around them. A normal archaeologist from the University of Chicago wouldn't have that kind of strength. Realization dawned on him. This was it. This was the Goa'uld they'd been looking for.

Richard reached down and grabbed Daniel by the lapels of his jacket. He hoisted him up and was about to strike again when shouts rang out. The crowd screamed and separated, revealing a half-dozen armed men in black pointing guns at the pair. Cameron Mitchell was one of them. Others decided to flee the scene. "Buddy, you better put the Air Force's favorite archeaologist down gently or there will be Hell to pay," he warned.

Richard turned his head to see that he was indeed surrounded. The sudden yellow glow in his eyes was unmistakable. A few people from the remaining crowd gasped, unsure of what just happened. They rushed out, leaving only the Goa'uld and SGC personnel. The simultaneous clicks of 6 safeties warned that Cameron's men were not kidding. Richard stood there, calculating his next move.

"Cam," Daniel said, strained.

"Yeah, Jackson."

"Make sure you don't shoot me."

"Sure, Jackson." Cameron raised his weapon higher. "I'm warning you one last time. Let. Him. Go."

Richard's eyes glowed again but he released Daniel. He fell to the floor unceremoniously. "There will be others to take my place," he gloated in the distorted voice of a true Goa'uld.

"Oh shut up," an accented voice demanded. Vala grabbed his shoulder to turn him and punched Richard in the face. He stumbled back, slightly phased.

"Whoa, Princess!"

Daniel got up and stepped over to Vala. He stroked her cheek where she'd been struck. "You okay?"

She nodded. "I am now."

"I'm not." He took one step forward and punched Richard again, sending him to the floor. Daniel let out a breath. "Now I am."

"Are you two done?" Cameron said sarcastically.

"Yes," they answered together.

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"So, Dannyboy, heard you got into a little scrape with a Gouldie."

"Yeah, Jack," Daniel said over the phone, "If you read my report you wouldn't need to ask me about it."

"Me? Read reports? Nonsense. Why do that when I can talk directly to the source?"

"Of course," he drawled out.

"Anyway, I just wanted to say 'Good job' and 'I knew you could do it.'"

"Thanks, Jack. Your faith in me is all I need," Daniel replied sarcastically. He added, "Although, we never found out who the Goa'uld was or who he was working for. He killed himself and the host before we could interrogate him. Can't say this op was a complete success."

"Who said anything about the op?"

"You just said 'Good job' and 'I knew you could do it.'"

"Yeah. With Vala."

"Jack."

"I'm telling you, Daniel. She's a keeper."

"What makes you think anything happened?" Daniel regretted the question the moment he asked it.

"Ahem. Does something like, 'I wouldn't want to ruin the sheets. You _know_ how we get,' sound familiar to you?"

"How the Hell did you…"

"Language, Daniel, language…"

"Jack! Where did you get that audio!?"

"From the bugs we left in your room."

"From the." Daniel couldn't even finish his sentence. He was so flabbergasted that he lost his ability to think straight.

When Daniel didn't go on, Jack decided to. "Didn't anyone tell you? We bugged your room so we could keep an eye on you, or rather, an ear on you; make sure the bad guys didn't get you in your sleep. We even had a few guys tailing you to make sure you were alright. That's how Mitchell and the boys got there so fast."

Daniel slapped his forehead and ran his hand down his face. "Those were your guys. Those were your bugs. NO, NO ONE BOTHERED TO TELL ME!"

"Yikes, Dannyboy. We were just watching your back."

"I. I. Aghh." Daniel took a breath and tried again. "Who exactly was supposed to tell me all this?"

He didn't immediately receive a reply.

"Jack?"

Nothing.

"It was supposed to be you, wasn't it?"

"Nope."

"Jack."

"Maybe."

"Jack."

"That's my name; don't wear it out."

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"Those were our guys? And the listening devices in our room were from your own government?" Vala sat across from him in his office, incredulous.

"I know. All this time we were paranoid about saying the wrong things or acting the wrong way."

"If only I had known."

"We could have acted normal."

Vala looked at him more closely. "Right, normal."

Daniel felt the eyes of a skeptic upon him. "As if there is a normal."

"As if."

A silence settled between them for the next few minutes.

"That man, Richard. Why did you dislike him so much?"

Daniel looked up from the book he was reading. "He was a horrible person. He treated women like they were objects to posess and then throw away. All of his assistants were female, and all of them quit. A few even accused him of sexual harassment, though it never resulted in anything. That's why."

"Oh. Well, I figured that part out."

"Then what did you mean?"

"I mean," Vala looked down at her hands, thinking of the right way to word it. "You did absolutely everything you could to keep me away from him. And you kept me close when he was around."

"Vala, don't you get it? He would have treated you exactly the same as the others. I couldn't let him do that."

"I see. Is that all?"

"What do you mean is that all?"

"You can't answer a question with another question, Darling. It's redundant."

He brought a palm to his forehead. Vala got up and came around to his side. She patted his head. "Never mind. I'll leave you to it then." She made the move to leave before he grabbed her hand and stood up.

"Vala. I wanted to make him jealous."

She didn't turn, but smiled. "Did it work?"

He paused for a moment. "Does Walter say, 'Chevron 7 locked' all day?"

Vala giggled and turned to him. She leaned in to wrap her arms around his neck. His hands found their familiar spot on her waist. "Redundancy, Daniel," she reminded him.

He was about to tell her that she was using the term incorrectly. Instead, he said, "Shut up." Daniel pulled her closer and kissed her. It was like fireworks. They continued for a long while, long enough to get noticed on the security monitors. Long enough for a General in Washington to be informed by the SGC's infamous grapeline (or just Sam).

Daniel's cell phone buzzed in his pocket, momentarily distracting him. He pulled it out and found a new text message. It was from Jack.

_Make sure you don't mess up the Air Force sheets, Dannyboy._


End file.
